I am amazed at how people think. I was reading a story about a
married man who was videotaped kissing another man’s wife. The husband, whose
wife was on the tape, is upset that the man did not apologize to him for having
an affair with his wife! Are you kidding me? I am confused. It is your wife
that stood before God and man and vowed to be faithful to you. The other man
"does not have a dog in that fight." The other man could care less
about you or your feelings. If he had, he would not have been sleeping with
your wife. You should be upset with your wife for failing to keep her vows to
you. It's her fault when it comes to her husband, just as the cheating husband
should be answering to his wife.
I get so worked up when I hear ladies who
act out/cuss out or want to fight the other woman for "messing with"
their husbands. Please do not get it twisted. No one can do anything that is
not allowed. Stop blaming the other woman and blame your husband. Even if she
pursued him, it is ultimately his fault. After all, he has vowed to be faithful
to you. The other woman did not stand with you at the altar. Nor does she care
anything about you/your home/your family or your feelings.
If we, as women, start putting the blame
on our spouse and stop blaming the other woman, we would do much better in the
long run. In holding our spouse accountable, maybe some of the nonsense of
cheating would be alleviated.
I read an article a couple of weeks ago
that explained that a man cheats to keep the woman he loves from leaving him. I
was "feeling some type of way" until I kept reading. The article,
written by a man, continued that once the main woman finds out that the love of
their life has cheated, she feels as though she needs to stay to
"show" her man that she is better than, more attractive than or a
better lover/person/mother than the woman he cheated with. As twisted as that
may sound, I have actually seen that happen. So I know he is telling the
truth.
A couple of guys tried that on me, many
years ago. In both cases, we were only dating. But for me, in any committed
relationship, that is a deal breaker. Today, both are saddened to see me happy
with my husband, whom I love dearly. They may have had the same type of love
and devotion from me, if they hadn't thought I was like other women they had
dealt with. In both cases, the guys actually thought I was going to
"fight" for them. Oh well, guess that didn't work out well for them.
If you want the foolishness to stop, start
making your mate accountable. Accountability will make others do one of two
things, either straighten up and act right or leave. And, with either decision
they make, we will always be better off.
OK, I am getting off my soap box now and going back to my regular scheduled programming!
Brenda McMillian
Entrepreneur, real estate agent, Vacation Doctor (travel agent), mother, wife, sister and friend.
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